awesomeness in austin

Airlines mess up sometimes.  Ok, a lot.  But so do all of us.  We are only human, after all.  Last Christmas I was flying to Cleveland from LGA on C***inental Airlines.  The cab got stuck in traffic and I was the second to last person to check in to the last flight of the evening.  Even though it was pretty close to the hour or forty minutes before takeoff, they wouldn't let me on the flight.  They said it was "overweight."  In my mind's eye I pictured a cabin full of fat, lazy midwesterners completely spent after their F.A.O. Shwartz/ESPN store/MACY*S freaking consumer extravaganza.  To the point where there was so much STUFF on the plane it couldn't handle another 105 pounds of ME.

The airline people tried really hard to be apologetic and to be honest I was just too tired and burnt out to care.  Just get me there, for chrissakes.  Do what you need to do.  The ticket agent said she didn't know if she'd be able to get us on another flight until after the weekend, i.e. AFTER CHRISTMAS.  Just as I started to contemplate how sad and pathetic spending the holiday alone in my studio apartment would be, she found us a flight to Cleveland, connecting after a significant layover in Buffalo, leaving from Newark, on another carrier, at 6:00 a.m. the next day.  They got us both a car service home and then over to the Jerz in the morning, which at that point was just a couple hours later.

So to apologize for causing me this inconvenience and emotional distress, the airline gave me a $400 credit to be used within the next year.  This week I had a full five days of vacation, the last ones for a while, and nothing really to do.  So I tried to think of someplace I could go, something exotic and as unlike NYC as possible.  A place that I wouldn't normally ever think of going unless there was a really, really good reason.  Somewhere like Texas.

So I packed my suitcase and stayed there with my cousin, his wife and their kid for two and a half days.  Most of the time was spent in the 'burbs, but that was nice and relaxing in and of itself.  I also went into Austin proper a couple times just to drive around and do some massive treasure hunting:
[Not pictured is the Cheap Trick record and Captain Kirk button, those weren't for me.]

I even made a personalized Google map for myself to figure out where the hell to go, but when I got to the last store on Tuesday night I found this:
I never made it to Barton Springs, but I did swim in the neighborhood pool.  I also never got to see the animatronic LBJ, but I did find this: which I later found out cooks hot dogs by ELECTROCUTING them.  It's at Room Service and I think it was $7 if anyone wants to go grab it.

So you know how in the beginning I said airlines mess up, like, a lot?  Well, it's embarrassing, but on Wednesday morning I missed my flight.  I had to leave almost six hours later, and fly back into that bitch EWK again.

My cousin was picking up the car later that day when he flew back in to Austin from D.C.  I was instructed to leave the keys inside the car, in the armrest storage area, because he would be arriving with a spare set.  As I readied myself to exit the vehicle, I looked all around inside the interior.  Did I have everything?  Phone, keys, wallet... yes, yes, yes.  Ready to go.  Lock the door and slam it shu... NO!!  NOOO!!!  MY LUGGAGE!!!  IN THE TRUNK!!!!!!

Ah yes.  The dangers of getting up at 4 in the morning and not drinking coffee within a suitable timeframe.  Don't let it happen to you, kids.